Customers: Gotta Love 'Em

I had another crummy day yesterday. Ugh. But its not for the same reason. No, yesterday was... Well, my in-the-dumps mood was brought on by an employee, but it wasn't a big deal. I just need to get over it...

Anyway, I just wanted to post something about all the customers I encounter. Holy Cow! I didn't realize just how much customers make my day. Well, I guess I've never looked at it that way. I mean, I've been working fast food for the three years that I've been employed. And when you're working with food, the customers tend to be grouchy. They want their food and they want it now. What more can I say? I never really saw the customers as anything more than hungry people who have tempers. But ever since I've starting working retail, I've found the customers can be rather entertaining.

So, I have this tendency to write while I'm at work. I'm a writer, what can I say? By the end of the day, my pockets are stuffed with receipt paper that has ink scribbled all over it. I write the things that go through my head as well as those funny encounters with customers. Well, my stack of papers has grown immensely and I thought that I would just put a few of them on my blog.

Yesterday, for one, was chuck full of hilarious customers. I was glad for that. I really needed something to brighten my day. Well, my favorite was probably when this Dad and his young son came in and bought specific parts for a swing. The boy must have been at least two. He was so cute! Green shirt and khakis with shaggy brown hair and a round adorable face. He and his dad were dressed to match. After they paid for their things and walked out the garden gate doors (oh yeah, I was outside the entire time. Four hours. That's like my entire shift! My legs were practically screaming in pain for standing so long!) anyway they walked out and the boy suddenly gasped! He whirled around and looked at me with wide eyes. Then, up went his hand and he shook it back and forth waving goodbye to me. It was so cute! I couldn't help but smile and wave back. But that's not all. As soon as I waved to him he started blowing me kisses! It was so adorable!

Oh and then, like right after this, another guy came in and bought seven bags of garden stones. Anyway, as he was walking out -I'm not sure how he got on the subject -but he just went off on Global Warming, saying that it was just a scam to ruin America. He was bringing up all these points of how America is forced to follow certain guidelines when it comes to helping the environment but that China has no such rules. He went off on a lot of things. I took it that this subject meant a lot to this guy. He just wouldn't stop talking! Of course, I was drinking in every word- he was so funny- but, man it was long. "We're not running out of oil. We have enough to last us three thousand years!" Then he started talking about how people live in fear now and that that's not at all what God intended. "It's because they don't know God," he said calmly. Man, some of the things he said made me think 'Wow, if I knew this man wasn't Mormon, I'd have thought he was Mormon!' He went all preachy on me and that was a little weird but Global Warming is a big issue these days. I was willing to listen. And then, after he left, he came back and said to me that he hadn't paid for all his things. He had originally told me that he had only six bags, but miscounted. He had seven. So, from his pocket, he extracted a small bar-code that he had torn from one of the rock-bags. "God told me to come back," he said. "Satan told me that Lowe's was a big store and that they wouldn't notice a single bag missing, but God shook his head. I had to come back. I won't lose myself for four dollars and eighty two cents. That's what Satan wants." I thought that was pretty cool. I'm sure a ton of people would have just shrugged it off. And then he got all preachy again and I had to agree with him that the adversary only has power over us if we willingly give it to him. After that the guy just looked at me. "And here I thought you were a liberal and I was gonna convert you, let you know the truth." "No," I said, smiling. "I know the truth." Little did he know, my words had more truth and meaning than he understood. I did know the truth. ....Anyway. So that was interesting. It reminded me of my Sunday-school teacher impersonating a Southern-Baptist Preacher. Very interesting.

Sorry, that was longer than I anticipated... Anyway, moving right along. Another circumstance was when I was trying to scan a bar-code and the gentleman holding it had his fingers over it. Well, I slid the scanner over it, sure that the computer would pick it up regardless of his hand being in the way. Well, I scaned and then the guy realized that he was in the way. He quickly pulled his hand out of the way and then yelped. I glanced up, worried that I had done somethign wrong. He whipped his hand back up and declared, "Look what you did!" I looked down at his hand and realized that one of his fingers was missing! Just as soon as my brain clicked together what I was looking at and the words he said, I panicked. It was my fault! But then, thankfully, before I had time to apologize or whatever his wife slapped him on the shoulder. "Don't do that to people. You're gonna scare the poor girl." Oh. I felt really stupid after that. But it was still funny. Maybe not at the time, but looking back it was a good (yet cruel) joke.

And then one of my favorites and then I promise I'll be done. I was inside and this elderly man came up and set his things on the counter. I looked up at him and asked if he had found everything alright. Well...when I looked up, he wouldn't look away. He just stared at me! He was staring at me, not like a person, but like a child staring at an unbelievable toy on the television; eyes wide and mouth ajar. I felt very awkward standing there. "Hey," the man said slowly. "You have braces on your teeth!" The awkward feelings suddenly vanished when I realized what he was on about. This wasn't the first time I'd been gawked at because of my braces. Not by a long shot. "Yes, I do," I answered. "And they come off in a few months too." The elderly man smiled up at me, overjoyed. "And then you'll have straight teeth!" I laughed. Just then his wife, or was it his daughter? anyway she came up beside him and the elderly man blurted out, "Hey, she has braces on her teeth!" It's like the guy's never seen metal on teeth before! Holy Cow! The woman smiled at me and rolled her eyes, "Yeah and she's trying to take your money." I frowned at her words, unable to comprehend them. And then I realized that I had my hand held out in front of me waiting to take the man's money for his purchase. So yeah, that was hilarious for me. I don't think I've ever been gawked at so much in my life!

Well, I did promise that that would be the last comment I left about customers. I have so many though! And I've only been there a month! I guess I could just save the others for another time. Maybe incorporate them in one of my other "real" posts. Anyway, I hope you enjoyed reading these as much as I enjoyed having them actually happen. Good reads!